Everything was normal until……

Last Saturday, I was at my laziest best; thanks to the lovely weather of Chennai. LOL. I had too many things to do, and so many places to go during the weekend and was trying to prioritize them. Repairing the DVD player for my folks that I got from my native topped the list. I picked the phone and called the service center guys to check if they were available on a Saturday. Unfortunately they were (sigh!), got their address and stuffed the huge DVD player in my bag and started from home.

I always have my mobile headset on as I find it difficult to travel without listening to songs or talking with someone. I have been advised many a times not to do so, but what to do, habits like heeding to advise is out of my dictionary. Its also a habit for me to sing along with the songs, that too in the same pitch and I believe I am being hunted by Chennai police for public nuisance. Btw, is there an IPC penal code for singing while riding? I hope there isn’t! All along the ride, the bag with the DVD player kept moving itself to the left and I kept pushing it back to the center; just like how you do it in a typewriter!

It was 4 in the evening and my head was fuming inside the helmet because of the heat. I took off my helmet at a signal, placed it conveniently on the rear mirror and put on my goggles. The traffic, the heat, the pollution, the heavy bag on my shoulders, and the pretty girls enjoying the AC inside a zen to my right, everything made me feel so bloody restless. I changed the song from Dev D’s Paayaliya to the title track of Delhi 6 and kept humming all along. The signal turned green, it was like a stampede and everyone panicked as if the world was going to end. I rode a little further and stopped once again as the signal turned red again just when I was about to cross the lakshman rekha drawn by Chennai traffic on the roads.

Scrrreeeeech! A red Toyota qualis suddenly stopped on my left with brakes fully applied a` la Tamil cinema style. After a minute or two, a window of the qualis was pulled down from inside and a hand appeared out of it asking me to come near. I went a little ahead thinking he would need help for directions (and also hoping that it shouldn’t be any political gundas!). The window was pulled down completely and a filthy rich middle aged ‘dude’ sitting inside beamed at me. He had so many magazines spread across his seat and was also wearing a couple of those huge stone rings (that’s all I could notice in those few seconds). I returned his smile, took off my headset (gulping) and :

Me : Ennange ? ( What sir?)
Stranger : Sir, neenga Jaya TV Raagamaalika vile paadneengala? ( Sir, have you sung in Jaya TVs Raagamalika?)
Me (blushing) : Amaa. (Yes) (shouting whooooopie! Inside)
Stranger : Vazhthukkal sir, romba nalla paadneenga ( congrats sir, you sang really well)
Me : Thanks a lot sir ! (literally jumping on my seat)

The signal turned green, both of us took different directions from the roundabout and the song in my mobile changed itself to Jai Ho !! ( Im not making this up, it really happened!)

I was in the middle of the road and didn’t know whom to break the news. I was literally on one of those numbered clouds, that was for sure. It made me forget about the heat, pollution, and everything else that made me feel cranky. I thanked that stranger in the red Qualis from the bottom of my heart for further boosting my confidence. According to me, it is these kind of out-of-the-blue public recognitions that matters anyone a lot.

This wasn’t the first time for me. I was recognized soon after my first episode in Oct. last year by a security guard at Satyam multiplex (theatres) and the second time in Dec (ironically, just after my final episode) by a Marrybrown home delivery guy! But what happened last saturday made a lot of difference, not because the stranger this time was an influential person, but because of the fact that my episodes stopped airing like three months back and someone still recognized me, that too in the traffic, inspite of my beard and the weight that I have put on since then!! LOL !!

Part 5 (b) - They finally shot me - Final post

continued from Part 5 (a)

It was declared earlier that only the top three would qualify for the final rounds. As of then, Vikram, Aishwarya and me were in the top three. Vikram is a terrific singer and to beat him with the scores was next to impossible for any of us. Aishwarya, the daughter of the program co-ordinator, was also too good. She only selected the toughest of songs but sang it with élan. All they had to do was to maintain our scores to reach the finals and for me, I just have to make sure that none of the songs are messed up.

Day 2 – July 23rd : Reached the place quite early again. I wasn’t tensed this time, rather very excited. All the three songs that I chose were quite simple and very catchy.

We had the regular pitch check for the songs; SB, who by the way is the director of the show, was impressed with my performance so far and started speaking to me normally, the 6 of us became good sportive participants; Vikram claimed on stage that he liked my voice the most (receiving such a comment from a singer like him was more than enough for me). Had some real fun on stage with Balaji; hope all that gets aired. Infact, Balaji and myself shared a good rapport on and off stage.

All the three rounds went well. No one of us got eliminated and I maintained my number 3 position. At the end of the day, I guess I got carried away with all the appreciations, that, I developed interests to be a part of the finals. I desired to win.

The song for the 9th round was still not known. We were told that it would be an impromptu Duet round, but for some reason, they decided to go ahead with a ‘Best of Ilayaraja’ round instead and asked us to prepare a good melody.

Day 3- July 24th : During the practice session, I had given ‘Vellai Pookal’ from Kannathil Muthamittaal as my choice for the 8th round.. But I decided to sing 'Ninaithu Ninaithu Paarthen' from 7G Rainbow Colony because through out the rounds, I wasn’t singing even one melancholy track.

After the pitch check with the orchestra, the cameras started rolling once more for the 7th round. I did really well and managed to maintain my 3rd position yet again. Sudhakar got eliminated this time; based on his low scores. It was five of us then; in the order of the scores - Vikram, Aishwarya, Me, Rajeshwari and Gayathri.

Vikram and me after dressing got into the studio while the rest were checking their pitch with the orchestra. To my surprise, Vikram was made to check his pitch and I wasn’t. I asked SB but she smiled and said I don’t need a check and that she believed in me. I took that as a compliment and delivered my best on stage.

Whatever followed after that, left a permanent scar in my heart. I wasn’t hurt, but I didn’t expect this kind of reaction from the judges, especially for that particular song. According to them, I was affected with something bad that they couldn’t find out. They asked me if I knew where it went wrong. I shrugged and replied that I didn’t. Worst part was when I had to say ‘Thank you’ for the horrible score that I received.

I became 4th in the order - Vikram, Aishwarya, Rajeshwari, Me, and then Gayathri.

Usually, after each round, all of us would be made to stand on the stage and declare our total scores till that respective round. The judges would then declare the elimination and the bonus points. For some reason, after this round, that wasn’t done (Its going to be evident on TV too). We waited to hear from the judges :

Judge-M.V. : We have decided to eliminate Vimal.
I involuntarily went one step back; literally, taken aback.

Balaji, who kept a note of everyones scores, immediately waved at SB who in turn stopped all the cameras.

Balaji to SB : “ How is it possible ? Gayathris scores are lesser than Vimals. Ideally, she should be eliminated, right? Is there anything wrong with the calculation ?”

SB : No. Judges decision, Balaji.

Balaji seemed helpless. I smiled at him and said ‘the show must go on’ (dialogue from a Malayalam movie ‘Joker’ delivered at a similar situation)

Camera rolled, retook from where it was stopped and Balaji continued his job as a host.

Gayathri, who was in the fifth position, got in and I went out. No one knew the actual reason for my elimination. All of them including Balaji said I performed well. I was upset, didn’t express it there though, it wasn’t about getting eliminated. I wanted a perfect reason, that’s all.

According to Vikram and Gayathri, I would’ve got eliminated because the succeeding rounds required technical knowledge in music. Their logic was that I did well and since they couldn’t find a reason to eliminate me, this was the only way. Some of them even claimed that I would have been a part of their script right from the beginning of the show. The makers, probably, expected me to create a fuss on stage after my elimination, which they could use for publicity stunts to increase the shows TRP. Damn, I am still not convinced with any of the pacified remarks. I have to watch myself on screen to console my conscious.

I stayed back to watch the next round. I was so impressed with Vikram that I gifted him the shirt that I was supposed to wear for the 9th round. With my elimination, all of them were a little tensed especially Gayathri.

Result for the 9th round – All four got through for the finals (when it was earlier declared that only three would qualify). A blow yet again; I was number 4 and I should have been there. It happens all the time; I get things unexpectedly, and don’t, when I really need them to. Bid good bye to all of them when they were on the stage and left the studio.

Went out, looked up, and realized, I don’t even have a God to ask him, why me?

The finals were shot on 28th July. They did have classical round initially, for the finals, but due to time constraints they decided to replace it with a Melancholy round. I did go to the studio to watch the finals and also to collect my consolation prizes. Vikram got hospitalized and could not make it for the show. Now, that’s even worse than my situation; he truly deserved to be the winner.

The rest is for you all to watch; who wins and who else gets eliminated.

Show details :

Jaya Tv – Raagamalika; airs at 9 am only on sundays. Repeat telecast on saturdays at 11pm.

Try watching the entire series and please do not stop with the first episode of mine, which, according to me, is horrible. I would be on air from this Sunday, ie, 28th Sep to Nov 16th.
Thanks a lot for being so patient in reading these posts and commenting here.
Its just the beginning…..

Also read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3(a), Part 3 (b), Part 4 and Part 5(a)

Part 5 (a) - They finally shot me !!!

Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 (a), Part 3(b) and Part 4, or else you wouldnt understand a thing !!!

As far I am concerned I had to undergo a couple of sacrifices for this show. I was already under a diet and was working out a little inspite of the torn ligaments in my leg. The diet began well before my first audition, and I decided to continue it so that I looked trim on TV. I stopped consuming oily, junk and creamy foods and had only bland food most of the time. I only had hot water, most of the times, with honey and lemon (this not only helps u in burning fat, but also clears your throat). Eventually, I reduced 5 kgs and I did look trimmer (Gained all that in a months time though). I kept a time limit (5-10 mins), had time slots to speak to my friends and family and some of my friends remarked that I am acting like one of those snobbish celebrities before even entering the show. Stopped watching movies for a week and listened to only those songs that I chose to sing for the show; initially 24 songs and after the practice session, the 9 songs.

It would only be appropriate if I briefed about what happened when the cameras weren’t rolling. The shot portions are anyway going to come on TV.

Day 1; July 21st – Though we were asked to reach the studio at 9 am, I made my presence there at 7.30 itself. I was the only person who went there all alone, the rest of them came with their parents. After dressing up, we were made to check our pitches with the orchestra. We were allowed to take the lyrics on stage and I didnt understand why Sb created a fuss on the first day. The judges were Malaysia Vasudevan and Uma Ramanan; two famous singers in the Tamil film industry. The intro song was not included for the judgement and so we were asked to relax and shed all those stage fear that we had. I was called fifth, after Vikram, Aishwarya, Sudhakar and Rajeshwari and this order was followed through out the show except for one round. The host Balaji (he is one of the best RJs in Chennai and now also a small time actor), called my name, “Vimal”. But I insisted him to call me, “Vimal Vijayan”, (for people who don’t know, that’s my full name). I am a little superstitious at times; including my dads name has always brought me luck. The cameras rolled again and I was welcomed with my full name with a little bit of sarcasm from the hosts end (I loved it though!)

There was a short intro on the stage about my whereabouts, likes and dislikes and after that I was asked to sing. Took a deep breath and when the music started, I gulped (yeah! the mike was away). As mentioned in my earlier post, I wasn’t quite happy with the intro song that I chose out of frustration. Unless I am convinced with the song, I wouldn’t be able to render it the way I want. According to the rest of them, I sang well, but personally if you ask me, I wasn’t happy. Well, it’s the intro song; no judgement and no more stage fear !!!

I passed the mike to Gayathri who went after me. Both Vikram and Sudhakar said I sang well and that I was getting worried for no reason. Lets see, its going to come on TV and I cant stop it !!

After Gayathris, we packed up and got ready for the next round. Each round is one episode and so we had to change our dress. This was the only round that I was tensed from the very beginning. 1940’s,(Thyagaraja Bhagavathars Naatiya Kalaye). Balaji asked me if I am all ready for the song. I replied saying that I was and since I hadnt learned music, I was a little worried. He then asked me to think positive and boosted my morale (I don’t know if all that would appear on screen, but the conversations happened when the cameras were rolling). I started off , not very confidently, but somewhere in the middle, I started getting into the groove and I am sure I ended it well. The judges gave some good comments and so did Sb.

Result for round 2 - none eliminated, and I was ranked #3.
After the shoot and before the pack up, Balaji called me separately and injected me with a few good thoughts on confidence. I owe a lot to him for this gesture of his.

Confidence level—increased. Stage fear –nil. I am sure I did the next round- 1950’s(Paattu Paadava) well and according to some of them, its my best performance. Balaji was dancing like crazy when I was rendering it and I hope they show it on TV. Judges were happy too and again got some good comments from them.

Result for round 3 – none eliminated and I was still #3.

That’s it for the first day. Next shoot was on July 23rd.

Trailor for the final part
Judge (after the 8th round) : We have decided to eliminate Vimal.
Host Balaji : How is it possible ? Gayathris scores are lesser than Vimals. Ideally, she should be eliminated, right?

Part 4 - They shot me !!!

After the meeting on 14th, I was totally puzzled. I didn’t know where to start, how to select the three songs for each decade, how to learn them, etc. Called up my dad immediately for help; he suggested a few songs and singers from the 40’s, 50’s and 60’s. Man, its all karma-phala; There was a time when I used to pester my dad to switch channels when he played the oldest of Tamil songs. And now I literally heard him grinning from the other end !!! Got hold of a couple of Cd’s from the nearest Music World; but honestly, I had no clue what I was buying. Most of the songs from the 40’s sounded similar, classical oriented and men sounding like women because of the high-pitch.

It took me three days to finalise the songs and three days to learn them. For 40’s and 50’s, I just had one song in mind. I was comfortable with the songs from 80’s onwards, as I learned a couple of them in the second audition, and for 90’s and 2000’s, I knew more than what was needed. Reached the venue, Sudhakar was already there and also a girl named Aishwarya. Dear old Sb was seated near some huge speakers and next to her was another lady (lets call her Um).

The practice session began. First Aishwarya went and then Sudhakar; poor guy had to change most of the songs that he had chosen. That’s when I knew that it was more of a song selection process than a practice session. Sb selected the songs and Um wrote them down (should be for the orchestration. Obviously, even they need practice!) In the meanwhile, the rest of the contestants filled the room; Rajeshwari (already met in the last meeting), Gayathri and Vikram. The six of us came face to face for the first time.
I was next. Took my songs list and stood in front of the two assessors.

Sb : How was the last week for you?
Me :It was good. Had to listen to a lot of new songs, I mean old songs that were new to me.

Sb : Ok, what have you selected for the intro round?
Me : Kumaari from Anniyan

Sb : No, that isn’t good, that is more of a comical song, whats the other one you have in mind?
Me : I had Sahara Pookal, but (turning to where Aishwarya was seated) she already sang it.

Sb: you have to come up another song.
Me : Hmm…

Sb : For 40’s?
Me : Thyagaraja Bhaagavathars’ Naatiya Kalaye (I sang it when she asked me to)

Sb: Havnt heard this before. Are you sure you are going to sing this well, I guess, it’s a tough song.
I nodded yes.

Got the song approved for 50’s; Paatu Paadava from Then nilavu

Sb : 60’s?
Me : Ullathil nalla ullam from Karnan

Sb : No, change the song (with a stern face, as if that song offended her)
Me : But I know that very well, I sing it well too and that’s the only song I know from 60’s.

Sb : Theres no way that you can sing that song…..No one
can…after Seerkazhi Govindarajan, there has been no one alive to sing the way he sang that particular song.
Me : But give me a chance atleast ?

Sb : NO and that’s final !!!
Me Grrrrrr…ing (inside)

Got the songs approved for 70’s and 80’s which were Paadumbothu naan from Netru indru naalai and Pani vizhum from Ninaivellam Nithya respectively.

Sb : 90’s ?
Me : En Kadhale from Duet

Sb : change! someone from the first batch had already sang it.
Me : Ok, then, Kayyil midakkum from Ratchagan

Sb (this time she smiled) : No one tries that song in a competition, are you sure you can do it well?
Me : Yes

Sb : 2000’s ?
Me : Shakthi Kodu from Baba (the one I sang for the first audition)

Sb : No, it isn’t even a song, change ! ( I wanted to ask her, if that’s the case, how come you selected me?)

Me: Vellai Pookal from Kannathil Muthamittaal (sang and approved)
Sb : Ok. Practice well, and get back to me before you leave for today with the intro and 60’s song.

I immediately rang up my friends for help on the intro song and finalized on Kadhal vaithu from Deepavali. Personally, I wasn’t happy with this selection. I was totally put off when she remarked about my 60’s song. I was confident and this lady wasn’t letting me try it even once. Though I had a buffer for the 60’s round (and I didn’t tell her that), I desperately wanted to sing the one I selected. I heard Gayathri, Rajeshwari and Vikram sing as I waited in the hall to give Sb my final list.

They literally shocked me with their talent; especially Vikram. They were all trained and sang like real professionals. Infact, all 5 of them were trained and I was the odd person. That’s when I realized the seriousness of the show. For them, this is a part of their ambition, their career, their dream! Though I am mad about music, I never had it as my priority; never wanted to establish a career for myself in playback singing because of various other reasons. I had no intentions to win; my only aim was just to be a part of the show and do my best. Millions are going to watch this on TV; and I didn’t want anyone to have a bad opinion on my performance. Moreover, out of the other 988 participants, who got rejected, atleast 60% of them would have been trained for years to get an opportunity like this. It was more of a responsibility for me now. I just cannot let anyone down; my family and friends, the Raagamaalika crew, or even the 988 other participants!!!

Next : Part 5 – they finally shot me !!!

Also read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3(a) and Part 3 (b)

Part 3 (b) - They shot me !!!

continued from Part 3(a)

I went to that office of theirs the next day at 3. 30pm itself. Two of the contestants came in later and three of us waited in the hall. I met them; Sudhakar and Rajeswari. That same judge (who auditioned us for the first and second rounds) walked in from a nearby room and sat in front of us. Let me call her Sb from now on and she also happens to be the director (andthe producer too, I guess) of the show. Without taking much of anyones time, she began :

" 12 of them were selected from the 1000 ones who attended the first
audition.
The shooting for the first batch, 6 of them, is currently going on and
for your batch, the rest 6, the shooting would be on 21st, 23rd and 24th. There
would be 9 rounds till the finals; so it is necessary that everyone learns 9
different songs.
Round 1 : Introduction round- any famous melodious song
released after 2005.
Round 2 – 8 : Songs from each decade starting from 1940’s till 2000.
Round 9 : Duet round.
The song for the introduction round should be finalized now. Three songs from each decade should be chosen, studied and there would be a practice session on 19th, which would also decide the final song for you to render. Is everything clear? The song for the duet round will be communicated only at the end of the second day of shooting.
Each round is one episode and all the nine episodes would be shot in 3 days.
So 3 different sets of dresses are to be carried each day. Lunch and
breakfast would be provided at the studio. Is everything clear? "

First things first, I got excited when she said I am one of the 12 selected from the 1000 participants. But when she started explaining the rounds, I began to breathe heavily. And this time the first word I muttered was “ Whaaaaat!!” I had no idea of songs that released before 90’s and I made a fool out of myself in the second audition. Now, 40’s, 50’s, 60s’….aaaaaAAAAHHH! This is insane. How am I ever going to do this? As far as I know, most of the songs in the 40’s and 50’s were highly classical oriented, predominantly sang by the legend Shri Thyagaraja Bhaagavathar. Is there a way out now?? Help….somebody…..anybody !!!!

Trailer for next week – the practice on 19th July
Sb : Theres no way that you can sing that song…..No one can…after Seerkazhi Govindarajan, there has been no one alive to sing the way he sang that particular song……..
Me : But give me a chance atleast ?
Sb : NO and that’s final !!!

Also read Part 1, Part2, and Part 3 (a)

Part 3 (a) - They shot me !!!

Due to the length of this post (it was unexpected!), I will be posting it in two parts- Part 3 (a) and Part 3 (b), but on the same week.

I didnt tell most of my friends and also to my relatives about any of the audition, I knew if I did, I would have been succumbed to a lot of embarrassing questions. I tried my best to be normal with my routines, but somewhere at the corner of my heart, my performance at the second audition really hurt me. I forgot how to smile, I stopped singing, all I could think was my failure. I hate rejections and I knew very well that I am not a competition material. This depression continued for 5 days; 5 and half days to be precise.

ZZZZzzzZZZZzzzz…(it was a Sunday afternoon and I had absolutely nothing to do, had lunch, watched TV and slept on the floor itself )….zzzZZZZZZzzzzZZZZ….
My mobile started ringing and it was from an unknown landline number. I picked up the call and heard a female sound at the other end.

Me : Halllaaaaooooo (howling a bit like Himesh Reshammiya, because I thought none of the serious species on earth would call me on a Sunday afternoon)
Lady : Is this Vimal ?

Me (making it sound silly) : Yessss, it iiiis !
Lady (once again, this time in a more serious tone) : Is this Vimal ?

Me (I got up from my sleep now, cleared my throat and looked at my clock, it was 3.20pm) : Yes, this is he. How may I help you?

Lady : Vimal, this is from Raagamaalika. You had attended an auditi…..
Me (interrupting) : Yes, yes, the audition that happened last week.

Lady : Well, you are selected, and next week, you have to make yourself free for three days of shooting at our Chennai studio. Are you in Chennai?
Me (silent for 5 secs, literally and I am not exaggerating)

Lady : Hello, Vijayan (calling my last name this time), are the signals clear? Can you hear me?
Me (tying to get things straight in my head) : Yes, I can and I am very much in Chennai. But..(didn’t complete!)

Lady : Is it possible for you to take 3 days leave, because the shooting starts from 9 in the morn and would go on till 7 in the night.
Me : That’s ok. I can manage.

Lady : Fine. We would want you to come tomorrow at 4pm for a small meeting to discuss about the rounds and the songs that you would have to choose. It’s the same place where you had the second audition. Can you make it?

Me (didn’t know how to react in my excitement) : Sure. Thank you Maam, thanks a lot (I am sure she knew I was very excited from my tone!)
The Lady laughed and hung the call.

Whoooooooooooooooppppppppieeeeeeeeeeeeeeee was the first word that came out of my mouth; that too at the top of my voice. The song Maaeri had never let me down in the past and it still didnt. I am finally getting my first break on TV !!!

Part 2 - They shot me !!!

Got up at 10 am. I could not believe the two things that happened in my life the previous day; first, the audition and second, that I actually watched the worst movie of the decade - Love Story 2050 !!!

I finalized the five songs and the classical song the previous night itself. But had to listen to them once more, take the print out of the lyrics and practice one more time before the audition. To be honest, I became better versed in the classical song than those regular songs. Probably, I concentrated more on the former. Unlike the previous day, I was calm and composed; I knew I was not going to get through. Reached the venue, but this time I was all by myself. There was a crowd near the entrance. I saw someone coming out first, and then a woman (who gave the registration form on the first day) came out and called a name and a number(the first audition number); and one of them from the crowd went in. My blood pressure rose as the audition was happening in an open forum and that the whole crowd going to watch me or atleast hear me sing. But again, no cameras!! I waited patiently having frequent glances at the lyrics. It seems that they have selected only 50 from the first audition and there, just in front of me, my ‘competitors’ were rendering keertanas while I was trying my best to learn some typical filmi songs.

At about 3pm, they called my name : Vimal Vijayan, No.649. I gulped (a bit loudly) and went in. Following were the conversations with the judge (which btw was a she and was the same person who judged the first audition) :

Judge : Ok, Vimal, what’s it that you are going to sing ?
Me (Taking out the lyrics of the most simple song) : Eeramaana Rojaave

Judge : Ok. Go ahead.
Me (Looking at the lyrics and singing) : Eeeramaaana Rojaaveeee….Ennai Paarthu Modaadey….(the beginning and the subsequent para)

Judge : Stop! Stop! Enough!
Me (silent) : Gulp (to myself)

Judge : Why are you staring at the lyrics? Don’t you know any of these songs by heart?
Me: I am afraid, I am not well versed in any Tamil song that released before 1990, I need to look at the lyrics to sing.

Judge : Ok then, sing in your regional language if you know any.
Me: I am not comfortable with songs in my regional language either (the real reason is because I don’t know the lyrics of any Malayalam song!)

Judge : Ok baba (seeming irritated), sing in any language, but make sure you sing without lyrics
Me : Ok, I will sing Maaeri for you, it’s a Hindi song from the album Phir Dhoom.

Judge : Maaa....whaaat ? Ok. Go ahead.
Me (placing my lyrics pages on a nearby table and singing once again) : Teriyaaa….Meriyaaa….Pul gayaaa……(sang 7 lines; to be precise)

Judge : Enough !
Me (standing still with an Oo oooh expression)

Judge : Are you sure you can sing Tamil songs on stage without looking at the lyrics?
Me : Yes, that wouldnt b a problem. I didn’t get ample time to learn the lyrics of (judge interrupting)

Judge : So you mean to say we are jobless.
Me : No, I didn’t mean that. These songs are totally new to me and I have learned these 6 songs only for this programme.

Judge : It says that you were born in 1981 and you should be knowing songs that released before 1990? How come you don’t ?
Me : The reason that I am a Keralite and also because I spent the first 15 years of my life in Dubai.

Judge : Why do you have answers for all the questions that I ask (grunts) ??
Me (smiles) : To myself, all questions should have answers, otherwise they become statements u dumbass!!!

Judge : Anyway, thanks a lot. We will let you know.
Me (gathering my lyrics pages) : Thanks (smiles again)

Judge (Ignoring me !)
Me : To myself again, what a cheapo? Why cant she even return a smile?

But wait, she didnt ask me to sing the classical song. Probably she knew that I am not trained and after all that had happened, she must have lost hope on me. Hmmm...I turned back and to my horror, all eyes were on me; my ‘competitiors’ were staring at me. I then realised the situation; it’s a tamil song based show and I just sang a Hindi one. Aaargh ! the humiliation, the embarrassment, the agony ! I decided not to look at anyone’s face. I knew this wasn’t for me. I hate competitions. I moved quickly towards my bike and left the arena ASAP.

Trailor for next week – July 13th and 14th; 5 days of depression, a call and a meeting
What? This is insane. How am I ever going to do this? Is there a way out now? Help….somebody…..anybody !!!!


Part 1 - They shot me !!!

Part 1 - They shot me !!!

I got shot; nearly 24 times and that too in three days; 21st, 23rd and 24th of July this year.

Life was pretty normal for me until July 6th. I never knew there would be a lot of unpredictable twists and turns awaiting me. I tried my best to come out of the situation; I could not. Even without my knowledge, I became a part of it. Everyone whom I knew promised that they would pray for me. I was helpless; my only wish was not to let anyone down. Wait, let me get into the flashback mode now and split the incidents; day wise (that would bring in a lot more clarity and also increase my number of posts !)

Day One – July 6th

I was at my friend and sister, Priyas place in the morning and she had asked me to get ready for an audition for Raagamaalika; a song based show that Jaya TV (Tamil channel) had been airing continuously for the last 6 years. For people who don’t know, Raagamaalika is not the typical reality show that comes on every channel these days. It’s a very serious show and the results are only based on the judges decision and not on votes. I was actually disinterested, as I have never sung for any competitions and was not sure if I could take rejections in the right spirit. Moreover, it’s one show where musical training is a must, which I do not have of any kind. But I couldn’t stand her persuasion; and together we left for the audition. There were almost 1000 of them there and that sight itself sent shivers down my spine. Approached a lady and got hold of the registration form. The only easy portions to fill up were my name and address. The rest were questions like “how many years of musical training do you have” and “mention other competitions/prizes/certifications” and I still had no idea what I was doing amongst those people; my ‘competitors’! I told Priya that if we leave now, we still have a chance to get away without getting humiliated. She grrr-ed at me and snatched the registration form from my trembling hands to fill it herself. After filling up the form, all that we were supposed to do was wait until they called my number - 649. Till the last moment, I wasn’t sure about the song that I should sing. I had a couple of them in my mind, finally 5 mins. before entering the audition room, narrowed down my choices to Shakthi Kodu and gave my best effort during the audition. Thankfully, there werent any cameras to shoot the audition. That would have made me even more tensed. They made me render only 4 lines and said that the results would be out by 4pm the same day.

Priya alone was anxiously for the results as I had lost all hope. At about 4.30, there was a huge crowd near the gate; boy oh boy, the results are out. I sat on my bike itself and made Priya go up to the gate and check. In less than two minutes, she ran towards me shouting “U r through ! U r through!” That was one of the biggest surprises in my life. I mean, there were people who were trained for years and I was one person who had been trained only by myself in various bathrooms. How could I? Or rather how could they? She came back with the second auditions’ criteria - learn one classical / semi classical song and 5 other songs from movies that released before 1990. The second audition was scheduled at 2pm the next day and that’s like only half a day left (subtracting 7 hrs of sleep and the 3 hrs which I was supposed to spend at Love story 2050 that night). Though I am aware of songs that released before 1990, I wasn’t sure how I would learn them and then render it in such a short time. To top it all, the classical/semi classical; how am I going to escape from that one now? For crying out loud, I have never been trained in any kind of music at alllllllll !!!!!

Trailer for next week- July 7th; the second audition :
Me : I am afraid, I am not well versed in any Tamil song that released before 1990, I need to look at the lyrics to sing.
Judge : Why do you have answers for all the questions that I ask (grunts) ??